Old School Roleplaying, the Writing of Fantasy Literature, and a Personal History of Wonder

As a writer of genre fiction, particularly of fantasy fiction, I want to acknowledge the influence fantasy roleplaying games like Dungeons and Dragons have had on me. These days many genre magazines and fantasy enthusiasts denigrate Dungeons and Dragons as a contaminating influence that aspiring writers should exorcise from the engines of their creative furnaces. Channeling Dungeons and Dragons, the argument goes, makes fantasy fiction formulaic and amateurish. I'm not sure where I stand on this issue. I've never had to read through a slush pile, and so I don't begrudge any magazine editor who makes these claims. And yet, it feels totally disingenuous for me to disclaim D&D a mite. Why? This is of course because my development as a writer was concomitant with my development as a fantasy roleplayer. With that said, I believe my experiences with D&D were more positive influences on my fiction and creativity than negative influences. The jury, of course, is still out on that.

This post is a brief collection of reminiscences of roleplaying games and their role in my perpetual struggle to write fantasy literature.

A history: in 1990 a board game was released in the U.S. titled, HeroQuest. It was a simple board game that simulated the adventures of a barbarian, an elf, a dwarf, and a magician through a variety of dungeons. At seven years old, I found the rules extremely complex and felt very smart for being able to read the entire handbook. But, if memory serves, this was my first encounter with fantasy RPGs.

I won't bore you with the full history of my relationship with fantasy roleplaying, which is no doubt typical of many folks my age. And yet, I'd like to relate some highlights.

By 1992 I had both the Dungeons and Dragons starter set (it was a black boxed set that included simplified Dungeons and Dragons rules and a dungeon, map, some plastic figurines, and some dice) and the Advanced Dungeons and Dragons player's handbook, dungeons master's guide, and monster manual. At 9 years old (a third-grader) I struggled with understanding the Advanced Dungeons and Dragons rules, but I had a mentor who guided me through.

It's a strange thing to admit this, but I was a fantasy roleplayer before I was an avid reader of fantasy literature. I know I read before the age of eleven, but I can't remember anything as stirring as my first encounter with J.R.R. Tolkien's The Hobbit in 1993. After The Hobbit I quickly read The Lord of the Rings (I tried to read the Silmarillion then, but was just too confused). This was followed by C.S. Lewis's Narnia books. And thereafter I found myself reading Dungeons and Dragons novels, predominantly R.A. Salvatore and his Drizzt Do'Urden stories.

Television, film, and video games also added to this early fascination with fantasy, but the iron core of it all was, without a doubt, D&D. In terms of television, I remember watching the Thundercats, He-Man, Conan the Adventurer, and a strange cartoon called David the Gnome. In terms of film, I remember watching Arnold Schwarzenegger's in Conan the Barbarian until my family's bootleg VHS needed to be replaced; additionally, there was Jim Henson's The Dark Crystal and Labryinth, and, of course, George Lucas's Willow. Video games were changing so quickly, and so its somewhat hard to pin down a few specific titles (there were lots and lots), but Dragon Quest and Final Fantasy on the first Nintendo Entertainment System were extremely intense experiences. Later games were Ultima Online and Baldur's Gate.

In spite of all the fantasy film, television, and video-gaming I engaged in, the main attraction was no doubt fantasy roleplaying. I can't explain why, but I remember being filled with a sense of wonder, wandering through the RPG section of Walden Books, drinking up the artwork that adorned the covers of modules and campaign settings and sourcebooks. Indeed, a large part of my youth was spent mastering and playing Dungeons and Dragons.

It wasn't until middle school that anything like a coherent narrative ever evolved from my friends and my clumsy and yet extremely fun attempts at playing that game. Throughout middle-school and high school two particular gaming groups stand out. One campaign lasted the full part of my high school career and getting together with friends we still reminiscence about episodes from it. I hate to say it, but the main villain of that campaign--an evil sorcerer who plotted to take over the world named Tys the Fool--has, I believe, became a part of my adult personality.

By the time I went off to undergraduate school my fantasy roleplaying was no longer an important part of my life. Writing creatively had overshadowed it as a hobby. Of course this had a lot to do with the fact that the friends I grew accustomed to playing this game with were far away and the real world began to distract us from what really mattered, namely, that other place.

In 1997, after the original publisher of Dungeons and Dragons went defunct, I lost interest. Why? A third edition was released that for this reason or that I found repellent. I'm reluctant to even speculate as to why the third edition (and subsequent editions, even leading up to the 4th edition of today) don't stir me. A lot of wasted breath and writing, I think, has been wasted trying to defend or attack this or that edition of D&D. This is what I believe: D&D was (and is) an aesthetic experience, and so trying to explain why I hate 4th or 3.5 or 3rd and love 2nd and Gary Gygax's AD&D is like trying to explain why I believe this or that painting is ugly or beautiful.

With that said, I've created a new section in my blog that will focus on so-called "OSR (Old School Roleplaying). Although the main focus of this blog will still be the writing of weird fiction, I want to bring this element out in the open.

The fact of the matter is, if it wasn't for the experiences of wonder I had through the stories I told and heard and participated in through Dungeons and Dragons, I probably wouldn't be writing at all.